Tuesday, January 15, 2019

Morning

A morning person I have never been

I stumble to the coffee pot and try to pour myself a cup of ambition 
(-Cue Dolly)

It takes a good 30 minutes for the fog to lift and yet somehow even though I can not string together words to form a coherent sentence, my mind is in staccato mode.

The most random unrelated thoughts
just ping pong around the dwelling that is my mind-

Blame it on my ADD- (Cue Awolnation)

So sometimes even if my body and mind have yet to make a connection I can get overloaded with thoughts and quite frankly I exhaust myself and it just flat out
puts me in an ill state.

I've tried reading first thing but even with readers the focus is not intact yet and anything read online just has too much competition on the screen-
what with all those colors, fonts and widgets.

Being outside helps but then my neighbor drives by and I am in my pink camo  panther robe with a spazzy rooster hairdo The fact that I haven't shaved my legs in awhile just set the white trash vibe.
This is NOT me. This is a gorgeous paid model who makes anything look classy.


Not exactly a great platform to spring from.

I want to start on a good positive note. A platform to if not seize the day at least shape it well.
This is where the greatest thing ever has occurred to me and changed my morning and the trajectory of my day

Podcasts.

I know they have been around a while and there are many. I've listen to some here and there but never could keep up with the "episodes" on a consistent basis.
 
Mornings.

I get one every day
I can barley function in them
I need direction and guidance with as little effort on my part as possible.

I need something to get in my head by way of my ears.

It's perfect.  I pop on the headphones.
Sip the coffee and listen to the hosts lead me.

I choose ones that are uplifting or entertaining and I march in to my day like a BOSS.

Here are a few of my favorites;leave me a comment and  share your favorites with me




Monday, January 14, 2019

WORD

I am writing today about the events of my weekend and with a writing prompt provided by my group @hopewriters.  The writing word prompt today is WORD.

This past weekend was a whirlwind. As Marc and I were moving our middle daughter home form Nashville ( yeah Graduate!!) I received word that my father was in the hospital.  Receiving words like that will stop you in your tracks. The fact that those words came via group text to my sister and I at 12:45am and we were unable to hear any words from my father's own lips until later was very stressful.  Sometimes words are not necessary  and other times the lack of words; waiting for word can be excruciating. 

The words that finally came were a throat punch : Heart Attack


My sister immediately went to be by dad's side for comfort, his health advocate and communicate information to the rest of us.  Things eventually turned out the best they could be. I focused on particular positive words as I listened to the information.  It was a MILD attack, ONE blockage, SUCCESSFUL stint and our dad drove himself to the ER at the advice of his physician. Apparently more words were needed to convey that Dad should get a ride with a neighbor or ambulance!  I come from a long line of self sufficient if not stubborn people. 

Friday, January 4, 2019

Please don't take my sunshine away..

It's 4 days into the new year and its the first day we have seen blue skies and this bright yellow object in the sky known as the sun. As I wandered out onto the front porch, where I do all my fantastic thinking, everything was vibrant and illuminated.  The greens were greener, the reds redder; the sheer lack of moisture resulted in non-existent fog and absent dew.  I could see clear across the street where prior I wondered what existed beyond the grey thickness that enveloped everything not 6 inches in front of my face.

 Next I felt the warmth, the radiating beams streaming earthward spilling over with abandon to every surface.  It was at this point I looked straight up and was blinded by the big ball of fire in the sky.  The only appropriate response was crippling to my knees and weeping.

I should insert a disclaimer here that it has been brought to my attention that I tend to exaggerate; however in this situation I AM SPOT ON.

I deal with seasonal depression issues every year, this isn't my first rodeo. But what I forgot this time around was some of the aides at my disposal as I wait for the sun to come back. Its always there even if I can't see it and that is something I need to remember in my mind as well.  When the winter comes here are a few things that help me beat the blues:

 Make Light 

Seems obvious but when the light outside is so dull and gray you think your in a black and white movie based in London, it is time to bring in your own light.  I've gotten in the habit of having candles around the house and when the POS ( yes it means what you think it does) of Daylight Savings Time steals the little sunlight there is. It creates a warmth and a coziness.  If you have a fireplace I highly recommend getting it lit as soon as the sun dips over the horizon.
 I also add a few more lamps around the house and use the softer glow bulbs in my fixtures.


My greatest light trick came from my sister (check her out at @unicorngenius) She bought me a Happy Light. It is a large light that simulates UV rays from the sun. I keep it on my vanity and turn it on as I get ready for the day. It is similar to the light people in Alaska ( God love their grit) use.  Anyone remember Northern Exposure? They had head lights on during their long and desperate winter.

Create Your Own Summer


Watch TV, movies  that are in sunny locations.
Listen to beachy music (Spotify) or put on National Geographic channel about the Islands.

 Enlighten Your Thinking


When the hum drum Eeyore thoughts creep in hit them back with literal sunny thoughts and facts.  Scripture has a lot to say about the sun. You can find many here, but to get you started here is one of  my favorites : Psalms 113:3
 From the rising of the sun to its setting The name of the LORD is to be praised

And with that whether you see the sun or not know that it is rising and setting according to the will of the One who loves you and keep praising Him.



Monday, December 3, 2018

WE

Oh 2018 where oh where have you gone?  I have been fabulously absent from writing here for a bit. I say fabulously because my days have been filled with great gatherings, meaningful moments, unmet to do list and enough mayhem to provide writing material for the next year.  Ah sweet life .....
how we write out our to do list and the heavens erupt in laughter.


It has been a very active year for our family. We have had some health issues, two funerals , moving my mom and lots of unexpected travel mixed in, all in a back to back format.  About a month ago it all slowed down and I was able to give myself a little self care. With that R and R came a bounce back of whats next. But as I began all my list and plans and consulted my 50 for 50 list I made back in February, some of those ideas no longer held passion for me. 

I think the family events that I was a part of shifted my focus a bit and I am developing new priorities.  The first think I noted was even though the past 5 months had been difficult for my family members as well as me, I was grateful to be a part of each of them.  Now I wont go into graphic detail here out of respect for my loved ones; but I was the one asked to help and am thought of sometimes as what I call " the go to girl". You may be that person in your family or rely on someone to fill that role. 
As I considered that I was thought of to help really humbled me. I have no special talents or gifts. No degree, no elite training or endless assets. I was glad to respond and so grateful for the strength God gave me to help. I have often thought that my greatest ability is my availability, and I have many that make that a reality for me. The first being my husband who provides steadfastly for us so I can be any and everywhere else. 
I am fortunate to walk together with my family during the struggles, grief, loss and pain. No it wasn't a festival of fun all the time where ate ice cream every night and won the lottery. Sometimes we bawled, cussed and courted Jack Daniels as we figured out the next step.  Other times we prayed, laughed and binged Netflix in between physical therapy or funeral arrangements. 


 But each time there was a "we". and that "we" is a representative of the most important priority in life: TOGETHERNESS. 
And whether it is in crisis or celebration

TOGETHER IS THE BEST PLACE TO BE

Thursday, November 8, 2018

TIME

Okay some may feel this is a cop out for a "local" gift but it is the most precious thing you can give.  YOUR TIME.   There is no replacement for you.  None.  And you have friends neighbors and family that can benefit simply by your presence.  Instead of ordering one more Amazon shipment, instead give a note with the promise of 2 lunches out together with committed dates. Or how about a " let's tackle that house project together friend, Ill bring the wine for the after party.

This shows so much. One you value them. Two you are willing to give your time and your undivided attention to the relationship.  A truly rare find in today's world.


Here are just a few ideas to get your mind rolling:

1. buy movie passes ( good for anytime) and suggest 2 dates to put on the calendar
2. Offer a "surprise" day for a friend that doesn't get out much.
3. Offer a night of free babysitting
4. Offer free dog sitting
5. Give a Free manual labor day to your newly married kids or your parents
6. Make dinner and deliver to your friend with the crazy , hectic schedule
7. Offer your skills to a friend who wants to learn; Sewing, cooking  whatever
8. Clean the house for an overwhelmed family member
9. Take your kid, spouse, out on committed date night and set 2 more in stone
10. Put up holiday lights for your elderly neighbor

Tell me what you have thought of. I know there are a ton of ways to bless people.

Art is for everyone

Today I want to feature a local artist that has a great influence in our community. Each one of my children have met in school or at the library.  He is a rare artist with an incredible outlook on life and truly inspirational to all he speaks to.    His website describes him as "a Christian Artist who is physically blind and Spiritually Sighted."   I  couldn't agree more.  

Ricky lost his sight in two separate freak accidents. While having to give up a great deal of independence it did not deter him form his love of art. He paints in a 3D style with thick paint and molding compounds.  His art is displayed in many local businesses in both Mobile and Baldwin county.  The uniqueness he displays in all his creations are a beautiful addition to any home.  What an extraordinary gift for a loved one and a way to support your local economy and the arts. If your not in my neck of the woods check him out anyway and see if there isn't something you love. Then find the local artist in your neck of the woods and purchase with purpose for a one of a kind gift that gives long beyond the initial purpose.

You can find Ricky here.



Tuesday, November 6, 2018

Today's Thank You goes out to all the volunteers at the polling stations today!!

THANK YOU VOLUNTEERS!!!!

Purpose Your Time

I have got a bit of a unusual suggestion for today's local purchase . I am featuring Habitat for Humanity Baldwin County.  There are numerous ways to get involved through building, volunteering to work at the Restore and donating to the Restore and shopping there too.

 You will also find all kinds of treasures there for your home. Contractors often donate what they have left from a recent build.  Check them out in several locations or call them to schedule a pick up of your donated items. Just think how much room you will have in your house when you donate that big item that no longer holds anything because you have already emptied it donating its contents.

So where does this fit into purchase with purpose?  It involves a bit of sweat equity on your part as well. Have your parents wanted to replace that ceiling fan? Redo the small bathroom floor? Well you pick up new items and donated contractor tile for both. Then give a gift certificate with your services on it.  It will make for a great and lasting gift and time with family in the future,

Ill catch you back here later for the Getting Grateful time!!


Monday, November 5, 2018

Sweet Grannie

Today  we received some sad news about my husbands grandmother . Sweet sweet lady at 94 passed away in her sleep last night.  What a kind legacy she leaves and we are forever grateful for her life.

So I will just post today with a reminder to thank those in your life every chance you get and remember that no man is an island. Someone has prayed for you, payed for you, taught you, been patient with you and worked hard for you to place you in the position you are today.
I leave you to reflect on those people and their love for you today.

I'll return tomorrow with some grateful purposeful suggestions.  Have a good night.


Sunday, November 4, 2018

Health and Happiness

I'm late, I'm late!!  I know. First order of business is extending grace and being grateful to double up on ideas today.  I flew in from Austin yesterday and just couldn't get the mind and body to coordinate.

Today's purposeful purchase feature is for any and everyone because it is all about health!! Everyone has it; could be good or not so good but here is where Wild Magnolia Kombucha comes in.  This company makes handcrafted , small batch kombucha right here on the Gulf Coast. The benefits of fermented beverages has a ton of data behind it supporting your health, Wild Magnolia makes small batches using the "mother" again and again. Think of it as the Amish Friendship bread of beverages.

  Last year I stocked up on their Elderberry syrup to gird up my immune system for the coming winter. My family and I remained flu free throughout a high reported season.  They can deliver or you can purchase at several local businesses form Lucedale Mississippi to Pensacola Florida. 'Im jonsen for some Lemon Ginger refreshment right about now.   If your not on the Gulf Coast find out what is made in your neck of the woods and buy local. Make up a basket for your culinary stars or health nuts and pass on the local goodness. 


Today's getting grateful : Goes to a friend who I don't see nearly enough even though we only live a mile apart!  Iv'e been all over the country for about 2 months due to some unplanned health issues with extended family members. My sweet friend kept a loving eye on my mom while I was gone. Taking her out to lunch and baking her some goodies.  So grateful for friends like this!!  Since I am headed out of town again this Thursday I'm writing the thank you note because while our distance may be close, circumstances are keeping us at bay.    Have a restful Sunday everyone!!!





Friday, November 2, 2018

Local take and give

Today we are in every room of the house looking for one specific item: BOOKS
 Gather up those mysteries, romance and autobiographies and put them in a box along with cookbooks, how to manuals and self help to donate to your local library.  Have your kids go through their books and drop them all off at the library while you check out a few more treasures.



Most libraries also have a small book nook where you can purchase books, Cd's and prints. See what you can find for the bookworm in your family. You could put together a mystery basket for Uncle Bob filled with the classics and some newbie of dastardly tales. Or a few cookbooks for the chef in your life. Add in a few accessories like tongs or an apron and there you have it. A thoughtful gift that keeps giving and a great way to support your local library.  If you make a basket , head back here and share the picture.

Thursday, November 1, 2018

Getting Grateful Day One

Getting grateful tonight. I am at my dads. A few weeks ago his wife passed away unexpectedly.  We all loved her so very much.  When the funeral was held scores of family members came in. My dad's neighbors are bed and  breakfast hosts in a 1989 gorgeous Victorian Mansion.  They opened up the entire establishment and  housed as many relatives as they could. We were all just a few steps away form my dad at all times.  This was a tremendous blessing.  So tonight I wrote a thank you note to that sweet couple. 
Of course I blurred for privacy









Oh and as a bonus this gorgeous place is for sale.
                               




Bonus picture of our room. That's my man writing out Scripture 
         
Good Morning November 1st!!  Lets get started with some purpose!!  The USA is in full Turkey mode with Thanksgiving just a few weeks away.  Its the most gluttonous meal of the year!!  SO today I have two great ideas.  The first is find your local food pantry, community center or church that provides meals. Today is a great time to donate non perishables, contribute momentarily to give a turkey to a family or sign up to help deliver then yourself!!!   Do it now!! Don't think about it !! Seize the moment.  Seriously I'll wait.........................



Got 'er done? Great! Me too. Prodisee Pantry has my turkey donation, I put my youngest on can food collection and we are signed up to put together the meals for distribution.
 Now the second purpose I have for you today is form a local artisan in my area.  When it is time to carve the big bird it should be done in style.

Austin Legacy Knives has got the blade to get the job done right.
Austin Andrews is a passionate young man with impeccable craftsmanship. Locally located in Orange Beach Alabama each knife is handcrafted with your choice of blade style and handle material to create a one of a kind legacy piece.


One of the most unique styles is the Heritage  collection where you provide the handle material. It could be from grandma’s rolling pin, your uncles shotgun or a tree where the swings once were hung. What an incredible way to pass on a treasured piece of family history.

Choosing a knife for the hunter, chef or collector in your family will be a gift that brings function, beauty and family heritage.

Check back here this evening for the get grateful portion of this month's challenge.



Wednesday, October 31, 2018

Get Grateful and Purchase with Purpose

Tomorrow starts the month in which Thanksgiving falls.
A few years back I ran a 30 day giving activity. It was a place  a day that you could give, donate or serve that was an established non profit or a local charity.  The beginning of that month starts with this link  if you want to check it out.

 I am choosing to embrace the month of November with a plan of gratitude and purpose.
I want to start and end every day purposely being thankful. I will find ways to purchase with purpose for the upcoming holidays.
Purchasing local or charitable is wonderful way to show gratitude and acknowledge others. Purchases that are local keep your dollar in  your community, appreciate the local business owner and applaud the creativity of local artists.
It also gives you an opportunity to give a one of a kind gift that doesn't come with prime shipping.
No offense to the big retailers but I am getting specific and intentional this season. The less clicking I do and the more engagement I have in my hometown the more relational interaction I will create.

Another reason to be truly grateful.  

I will also throw in a few international organizations that have a faithful financial track record and result on the ground for those they serve. These will be organizations that I have given to throughout the year and also rate high with Charity Navigator.

I will end my day writing  a thank you note to someone who has influenced, blessed or been involved throughout my life or the life of my family. 

 My day will be hedged in these two parentheses of gratitude.

So stop by each day and see what is new. And leave me a comment and let me know how you get grateful and how you purchase with purpose.

Saturday, October 27, 2018

Peace

This was written back in February with the Parkland shooting. I never published it but came upon it today before the Synagogue tragedy happened. I decided to share and welcome your thoughts :
If I ruled the world…...I would inevitably screw it up.  But I can add value, and I can do that without ruling it. I can do it beginning with ruling myself.  So, as I say that I’m going to put my mind to paper- a bit like mental throw up, who knows if it will make it any further than this page and my eyes but here goes.

Today, our world and, our country really sux.
There has been yet another school shooting. 17 people.
17 precious lives lost, countless others wounded and affected that still breathe this side of eternity. Included in that the life of the shooter.   
I know there is good in the world and I believe that God is good and powerful- I do not know why He chooses as He does nor, will I debate this with anyone.
I see humanity divided in 2 directions when tragedy strikes. One that says prayer does nothing and only actions matter and another that thinks only prayer will work.  I believe in a combination. I believe in falling to your knees and seeking the only Hand that is truly in control and then I believe in moving and working in any area we have been given control over. After praying or while still praying I believe in getting up and doing; and If I can’t stand then I crawl, but I believe in moving.
My words and my action both matter.  It is not an either/or but “AND” that is calling us.  Not a faith OR work mentality but Faith AND Work calling.


Consider what it would look like if we truly humbled ourselves by the millions and called on the name of God to act? Would God move as He did in the past?  I would like to find out. I know it would bring us seeking together, even if only in physical proximity; which is something that we are not doing, as of today.
We would be wise to seek first the repentance we need as individuals and as a nation. An arrogant heart will not move the hand of another, much less the hand of the Almighty.  We have been instructed as much and witness this truth time after time; throughout time.
But here is where the “AND” rather than the “OR” must be.

As we seek the Hand of God to move, we should be moving our own hands and feet. This is so important to God that we love in action. So important that we love one another in word and deed. He shows it through the demonstrative action of His love and the cross.

It is so primary that we be reconciled to each other that He requires sacrifices of Himself for our benefit throughout scripture. “If you have a gift to present at the altar to honor Him, but in your heart, you have a grievance with your brother leave and go and reconcile with him. “(paraphrase)
The God of all humanity, worthy of all praise and worship, fully in control chooses to place the desire for us to love one another before the adoration of Himself.   
Mabey, just maybe He wants us to do life together. In Unity.  All of it. Pray together, move together, work together. Side by side. Hand in hand. Hear and there.  You and me.
Others say prayer is wasted and only action matters. To be honest both groups make me a bit disappointed, especially when I find myself dwelling in one or the other.
Faith without works is dead is scriptural, as are the words of Christ “Apart from me you can do nothing”. This is more evidence of the AND that we need.
And while actions change the world, faith is the driving intention of our action.   Prayer brings us under the same umbrella, binding us and shielding us from the storms that this life brings as we cling tightly and depend on one another. Most importantly praying empties us of ourselves.   I know I am wonderfully and fearfully made and I also recognize my propensity to be sinful creature in need of the One who not only made me, but created salvation from my self-destruction.
To those who pray earnestly, seeking to move the hand of God I urge us all to pray not only alone but together. And in those prayers, seek to be emptied of yourself and seek what you can do, where you should go, the direction your hands and feet need to be moving. Let us Wake up and Show up.   Act in kindness and sacrifice wherever you go. Unnoticed, unrewarded but never ineffective.

As of today, there will be a thousand comments on how to fix things, another thousand on who is to blame. These comments will then lead to arguments between strangers who may never meet but will openly criticize and condemn one another brazenly behind the shield of a blue screen. Many will love the sound of their own voice expressed in keyboard taps.  False narratives will come out, ultimatum solutions, and social experts will be born. Even families who live within spitting distance will do just that to one another on a virtual platform. Alliances will be formed over mutual ridicule of another’s view, flippant suggestion, or reactive thought.
NONE of this will prevent another tragedy, NONE of this will bind up a wounded body or heart. The chatter of participating voyeurs has no healing ability. It is useless for solutions, guidance or answers.
 But do not be mistaken into thinking has it has no power.  It has the power to distract, to divide, to destroy. It distracts us form the horror that is. From the reality that isn’t personally touching us but is ever present before us. We get to chime in on another’s tragedy and offer our so informed solutions: or better yet our “told -you-so” preventions.  We allow media to mesmerize us as it presents the train wreck we just can’t look away from, but refuse to get bloody amid.
We will look for answers, reasons, villains, heroes and side stories. The media will continue to supply the chum we demand and devour it like a frenzy of starving sharks.
As we are distracted the divide among us will deepen. We will blame one entity or another and all who would dare be guilty by association.  Our fingers will come out pointing, then they will continue to place into print what our lips are uttering. Profanities will be spewed upon   human beings that have the wrong colors beside their profile picture. We will add our 2 cents worth, giving our precious time to express our mighty opinion and claiming our right to do so. We strike the iron hot and break the foundation of loving each other. Every comment, reposted opinion and vomited thought deepens the crevasse.
As we move to our prospective sides we console ourselves that we have found others to join the “Us” that is against “Them”. And then we convince ourselves that is enough. Our unity is against the common enemy.  But we are the enemy. The enemy of our own souls and the souls of our brother. Destruction level: satisfied
Then we keep up our bitching by the watercooler at work, our frequent social media breaks and our agreement over that ignorant people we are not apart of as we have drinks on the front porch.  And then after a few days we move on because we have things to do for ourselves, our lives.
Another tragedy will unfold and take the place of the current one and like insulin to a diabetic we will seek sustenance once again from the latest event.

I say all this to myself and anyone this ever gets read by. Today I am processing, and I do that best by writing, sometimes I share, sometimes I don’t.  But I say all this in an out loud way because I have been a part of it at one time or another. I write as a one guilty. But I also write as one who has been confronted with that behavior and has made a choice to see it and make another choice.  
I have always wanted to encourage others. And that takes courage. The kind that sees yourself. All the able, ugly, kind, hateful, guilty, repentant, forgiven, accountable mess that I am.  All of this. Within all this I would like to encourage people to get off the ineffective forms of humanity.
And yes, I know social media is not evil of itself and can do a lot of good. I get it. But the fact is-- It isn’t doing that right now.
Because individual by individual is not choosing well.
I encourage us to choose more wisely.  
How can we hope to bind humanity when we choose to trust technology to handle the issues that should be met skin to skin?

Today take the time-consuming way, take the repentant, humble way. Take yourself out there. Praying, feeding, building, writing. Holding the hand of someone suffering without offering your words. Sacrifice your time, tears and tender for another and expect nothing in return. Write the letter. Buy the meal. Silence your phone.
Hold back your immediate opinion. Listen, even when you don’t agree. Then suggest you both go DO something for someone. Be random, be specific. But be a seeker and a doer.  
And on days you can’t seem to move at all, be still. Don’t add to the problem and don’t condemn those who are, without first offering them to be still with you, have lunch with you, create, laugh or cry with you.  They may or may not take you up on it. That is okay, you don’t control it all and you have no business condemning what you can’t. Let that go. Control yourself, your words your reactions, your time.
Don’t be distracted when you can be dedicated.  
May Peace Be With Us All.

Wednesday, October 24, 2018

Looking back Looking forward

Grateful View

(reposted from 2015)
Grateful for what I can see.  And grateful that I can choose what I see.
The eyes have been said to be the window to the soul.  Be careful what you let in .
Jesus said the eye is the lamp of the body.  And if your eyes,are healthy your whole being will be full of light.
What you see is important.  It filters to the whole of you. You think on it. Let's face it there are just some things you can't unsee.  It shapes your thinking.
In Romans it says to transform your self by the renewing of your mind. This verse comes directly after a verse telling us to use our bodies as,a living sacrifice holy and pleasing to God.  A link between your body and your mind clearly exist. We can prove this medically now in 2015, but God , who created both body and soul, tells us it is so. 
 
The eye is a part of your body and a instantaneous link to your mind. If you fill it with images and words of the  world how will you not be conformed to it?  Now this isn't to say walk around with a blindfold but be aware of what you allow in your eyes and what you put your eye to. Where do you focus?
If we have our sight let us be grateful by choosing wisely to put truth, beauty and light before our gaze. Let us be grateful by turning not a blind eye, but a watchful one away from evil, darkness and deception. 
I've chosen poorly lately . So please don't think I come from a position of criticizing.  I come from a position of confession.  I make bad choices sometimes. Some deliberate. Some lazy.
But poor.  I'm grateful I can repent of this and I'm grateful I can choose again.
Grateful to see another moment with my eyes and my soul .
I get to  open, close, and shift my eyes to the light.  
I'm grateful and looking forward to seeing better tomorrow.

Saturday, January 16, 2016

How Grateful looks from here- Bloghop!

It's a Blog Hop!!  Scroll down to see other great posts  about Raising Grateful Kids!!




The morning started gloomy and if I am honest--- whiny. It wasn't the dog, it wasn't a kid with any demands; no it was that unsatisfied pathetic sound of my own voice pounding against the walls of my head. I had barley been conscious a full minute and I had complaints dominating my thoughts.  There wasn't anything in the day ahead that I was dreading; in fact the day held a celebration . So why did I start in on everything negative? The thoughts ran quickly  from " Man my neck hurts." to "I should have read more to my  kids when they were little, I've ruined them." ( drama much?)

As I lay there waiting for a surge of serotonin to miraculously save me, I finally came back to reality and remembered very simply to be grateful. This is something that we have been working on in our house.  3 kids, 2 dogs and one busy life have distracted us a bit from stopping to observe our blessings and be grateful. We have just come  off a big push getting our 2nd daughter off to college.  We have been a little tired. We have one precious child left at home and we want to finish strong giving her the same discipline and values we have practiced over the years. We cannot afford to get lazy.

I have been reading Raising Grateful Kids and was extremely convicted by the fact it brings up that if we want grateful kids rather than entitled ones, we ourselves have to show gratitude.   I can't adopt the attitude that I am a certain stage in life and I deserve such and such . I can't expect my child to continue to have a grateful attitude when I am not displaying one.  I have so many blessings that I take for granted every day: freedom, access to Scripture, health,  children, marriage, living parents, running water, friends, the ability to read and many more. 

Many years ago we would talk about the best and worst of our day at the dinner table, we made Thursday into Thankful Thursday and would thank someone in our lives that we loved with a note, card or cookies. These small acts that my children did when younger were reminders to be thankful.  Somewhere along the way we let these little acts slide off our radar.

We have kept up with some habits. I am a stickler for hand written thank you notes. No text or email.  This is a wonderful habit instilled in me by my parents, and I am glad I passed it on to my children.  But more is needed, and the best place to start is with myself and my attitude.  So as I lay there like Eyeore from Winnie the Pooh I had a decision to make: let the language of Whinese continue its rant or take inventory.

 I choose to the inventory. 

I opened my eyes and was grateful for sight. I listened  and heard the dogs barking in the yard. I can hear-  check.  I have warm covers on me , I have a ceiling above me . As I place my feet on the floor, I am aware of a working body and a carpeted floor. I have warmth, shelter and health.  I check my phone on my bedside table. There is text message from my daughter.  I can read, I have access to communication, electricity and  and a message from a beautiful child who loves me.  That is 10  things I can be grateful for before I even take my first step of the day.
We plan on bringing back  best of day and Thankful Thursdays but if I am to be consistent on these small acts I have to first consistently have  my thoughts be grateful.

Then my thoughts will become my words of gratitude
My words will become acts of gratitude
My acts of gratitude will become my habits of gratitude
And my habits of gratitude will become my legacy of gratitude.
And that is something worth getting out of bed for everyday.


Inspiring an Attitude of Gratitude - by Alison Rasisng Grateful Kids - by amanda Why You Can't Buy Gratitude At The Dollar Store - by Andrea Missing - Gratefulness in our home - by Ange Choosing Gratitude - by Angela Gratefullness - by chaley 5 Steps to Gratitude-Fille Family - by Christa Practicing Grateful Parenting - by Dana Sing a Song - by Hannah Cultivating gratitude in our family - by Jamie Gratefulness In Our Home - by Jana Gratefulness In Our Home - by Jana Let It Begin With Me - by Jen Choosing Gratefulness - by Jennifer Raising Grateful Kids in an Entitled World - The Book - by jeri Eradicating Entitlement - What are you rooted in? - by Jessica Gratefulness in our home - by Kate The Problem With Entitlement is that it begins with us - by Katelyn 7 Unusual Ways I Know How to Be Grateful - by Kathryn Raising Grateful Kids - by Keri How My Children Remind Me to Pray with Gratitude - by Kishona Grateful - by Kristy Entitlement: The Ugly Truth of a Beautiful Lie - by Leigha The Most Important Thing You Can Do To Raise Grateful Kids - by Lindsey Dear Son: How Do I Teach You To Be Grateful Without Guilt? - by Marie Osborne Gratitude, A Practical Definition - by Mia Cultivating Gratitude in Our Home - by Nancy Learning Gratitude through Chronic Illness - by Rachel Being Grateful - by Rebecca I've Found Something I Can't Live Without - by Sarah The Power of Naming our Gifts - by Sarah Outfitted - by Sarah Jo Growing Gratitude in our Family - by Sondra Teaching Gratefulness - by Stephanie How Grateful Looks From Here - by Alison Fighting Entitlement in Children and All of us - by Leah Entitlement Problem - by Karrie Grateful Today - by Krystal

Monday, January 4, 2016

Time Matters


Chapter 2 of Raising Grateful Kids is a real  throat punch for me. 


 As Kirsten Welch describes life in the 21st century  I was highly convicted of some aspects of our lifestyle that we had let slip a bit. She states that " It’s as if our culture has amped up life and made things more complicated, not because we have to but because we can. " Those words " because we can" really got my mind going.  Things have become so easy for us in daily life. We don't struggle for our food,water or shelter. We don't  repair anything anymore; we call someone or buy new. We can be reached at any time in multiple ways .

 Now I'm not saying that I want to go back to the 1900's but I so long for simplicity and self control in my choices for simplicity. I am as guilty as the next person when it comes to the quick and easy. I have  said yes to to many things knowing I can quickly do a lot. I have more done but I have lowered the quality for myself and others.  



On the simplicity standpoint I really wish our culture and manufacturing heard this cry. I don't want a computer on my washing machine or 500 features . A gyrating machine does not need electrical unit on it that after so many shakes it will fail me and I can't wash a thing. I just need some water, an extra rinse and some longevity and I am good to go. (Sorry a bout the side bar rant..... I am not bitter about being out of warranty, I promise.)
   
We need a happy medium, where what we have is enough and indulgence isn't the  norm , it's the exception and the worked for, effort put forth thing that we really wanted ,and will take care of to keep.

 We now have, as RGK states, "  time and money to focus and care deeply about things that really don’t matter." This is incredibly true. ​ We fill our time and our children s time to the brim with  activities, These are not necessarily  bad but when they  are all  about "them" , how do we expect to magically have children one day that will be jazzed to serve others?  Our time is also  taken up by  social media and we look at our screens more than we look others in the eye. (more on this in upcoming chapters)

 Now a little distraction isn't wrong,  but if we really knew how much time we spent on worthless things we would be shocked.  As a mama of 3 girls, two in college and one in high school my advice to those with littles would be not to rush or worry about sports or a to spend your time ,energy and money on what matters and last, spending  as much of it as possible together as  family for as long as you can.
The chicks when they were little





-- 

Tuesday, December 29, 2015

Raising Grateful Kids


                                                                 






                              

I have recently begun reading the book Raising Grateful Kids in an Entitled World (RGK)  by Kirsten Welch as part of a book launch team. It is a timely and convicting read laced with confessional encouragement and inspirational guidance. It is available here for pre-order for January.


The first chapter discusses wants vs. needs and the American dream.  I can remember doing a school assignment with my oldest years ago on wants and needs. It was a      mixed lesson discussing the economy, budgeting and essentials of society.  Pretty ambitious for the second grade. It asked the students to list in two columns wants and needs.  It encouraged you to list general things and then break them down.

 For instance:

Shelter is a need but what kind of shelter could be listed under both need and want.  This is where it got blurry.  We live in a 2300 square foot house of brick, wood and dry wall. It has air conditioning and heat. Electricity and running water. A fine home indeed.   Now I believe everyone would consider four walls, a floor and a roof over their head a need.  I live in the deep south of Alabama. As I type this it is late December and 75 degrees so I consider AC a need; yet people have lived in this region for centuries without it. (and yes I realize some have died due excessive heat.)   But there are people all over the world, in places far hotter than Alabama such as the Middle East and Africa who have never nor will they ever have AC.    Another example was food. Everyone must eat to stay alive. We need food, but we don’t have to have lobster everyday of our life.  Here is where of course the budgeting lesson came in.
Then there were some intangible needs like safety or education.  Everyone needs to be safe. But exactly what does that look like?  Military? Police? Handgun? Gated community? Guard dog?  The discussion could go on and on. What the exercise did was not only allow you to see the very basics of human need (food, water, shelter, safety, education, love, employment) but also required you to consider the specific way in which those needs were filled and if those ways blurred into wants. 
Now this is not to say that it is wrong to want things above our needs. It simply lets us see that many of our needs are met and it changes our perspective into one of grievance to gratitude.  In addition it helps us to analyze how we go about meeting those needs and which ones we place as priority. Striving to make a basic need made better isn’t greedy either, when it’s launched from a platform of gratitude and kept within the boundary of enough.

This was a great lesson for my second grader and an eye opening one for her mama. Kirsten Welch writes   that “ as uncomfortable as it sounds, parents who want less-entitled kids have to be less entitled themselves, and parents who want to raise more grateful kids need to start by living more grateful lives.”  Wow -this moment was brought to me by Rude Awakening Productions. 

This realization coupled with the simple second grade exercise is a sign that it is time for a reevaluation of our family’s current wants and needs.  I have a sneaky suspicion there will be some category hopping.